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There’s always something to howl about

If you can’t sell, teach. And if you can’t teach? Teach e-Pro!

I don’t pay close attention to this crap, because — well — it’s crap. But you may have heard that the NAR’s most-idiotic designation, e-Pro, has been taken over by a confederacy of dunces super-nice people from Agent Shortbus (where they “pour” over everything, especially maple syrup over waffles) called SMMI.

You have to read between the lines in this press release, but my take is that the swamis from SMMI are going to teach you how to waste your days on TwitBook just like the cool kids. You might think that this is a suicidal strategy for working Realtors to pursue, but as has been discussed here lately, apparently the notion of working is one the cool kids are trying to get away from altogether.

Like this: I am told that the e-Pro trainer-training event held by the smarmies at NARdigras drew a thick slice of the most-prominent twitwits. I don’t know if they’re going to stop officially selling real estate — how would one know the difference? — in order to become full-time carriers of the TwitBook virus. The one thing we can hope is that the long-standing stench of e-Pro will arouse working agents from their TwitBook-induced stupor before they go completely broke.

And if they don’t? Crush them like bugs. This business isn’t for everyone. TwitBook is just the new bullpen, the new water-cooler around which losers can gather as they gripe themselves out of the real estate business.

Looked at that way, the e-Pro trainers in training could be doing all of us a favor: Isolating the people who won’t make it and teaching them How To Succeed At Failure.

I’ll leave you with two thoughts:

First, if you are deeply offended at seeing pompous, blustering, sputtering, know-nothing jackasses being skewered in public, please just go away. I don’t care, and I cannot imagine how anyone over the mental age of nine even could care.

Second, if you don’t want to go down the toilet in a very amusing public display of TwitBooked indolence, get your nose to the grindstone, your shoulder to the wheel and stop pretending that schmoozing with losers and vendorsluts is somehow work.

Work leads to paychecks. Wasting time on TwitBook leads to bankruptcy. And if you can’t tell the difference… you just might make a good e-Pro trainer!

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  • 15 comments

    15 Comments so far

    1. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Real Estate Feeds and My REALTY, Tom Hunter. Tom Hunter said: If you can’t sell, teach. And if you can’t teach? Teach e-Pro!: I don’t pay close attention to this crap, becaus… http://bit.ly/bk30mN [...]

    2. Kevin Tomlinson November 4th, 2010 11:37 pm

      OH mi gAWD. Greg you are a meany, meany.
      Hysterical. SMSOI.

    3. Keith November 5th, 2010 6:55 am

      Anytime you can learn about a subject in a two day class, you should run very far and fast.

    4. Matt Heisler November 5th, 2010 6:59 am

      I love the entire designation scheme. Charging hundreds of dollars a year for a logo? I wish I could think of a good one. How about Foreclosure Realty Assets Understanding and Development (FRAUD)? I think that might actually be a designation that means something.

    5. Greg Swann November 5th, 2010 9:01 am

      > How about Foreclosure Realty Assets Understanding and Development (FRAUD)?

      Brilliant! You’ve got the game figured out.

    6. Jeff Brown November 5th, 2010 9:06 am

      Twitter Wealth Accumulation Teacher :)

    7. Kevin Tomlinson November 5th, 2010 9:13 am

      I have a real, serious question: (yes, a real question coming from Kevin, grab the heart pills)

      How can they claim to help you make money from Twitter–when Twitter can’t even make money from Twitter?

    8. Robert Worthington November 5th, 2010 9:29 am

      Kevin Tomlinson great point which actually goes back to what Greg was saying, basically NAR sucks and e-pro is for idiots. Well written as usual Greg! :)

    9. Greg Swann November 5th, 2010 9:59 am

      > Twitter Wealth Accumulation Teacher

      That’s going to be hard to top.

    10. Thomas A.B. Johnson November 5th, 2010 10:25 am

      Well, Facebook does begin with an “F”. Enough time wasted on this diversion…

    11. Mark Brian November 5th, 2010 4:23 pm

      Should it be considered ironic if I tweet this?

    12. [...] of rancor that BHB can be.   And then we get these gems of conversation from Brian, Jeff, Al & Greg.  And I’m drawn right back in.   Nothing’s perfect, everybody’s crazy, right? [...]

    13. Sean Purcell November 6th, 2010 12:16 pm

      It comes as no surprise that we are still discussing The Twittering Twits of Twittledom. In the past year I’m guessing the numbers cited in that post have grown substantially. (But I’ll bet you a month’s worth of real estate commission created by Twitter ;), they haven’t improved in relation to one another.)

      It was H.L Mencken who said: “No one in this world, so far as I know, has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people” and I believe the accuracy of this statement would be infinitely increased with the substitution of “REALTORS” for “the plain people”.

    14. Bill Lublin November 6th, 2010 4:22 pm

      Greg – Your statements regarding the course, the authors, and the trainers are false, inaccurate and misleading.

    15. Kevin Tomlinson November 6th, 2010 5:02 pm

      Bill,
      Hi! I know that you believe passionately in what you teach.

      However, I must say that that claims and implications of what SM “can” do for an agent’s business are not proven.

      Heck, Twitter can’t make money off of Twitter.

      I honestly and truly believe that this whole “SM will cure all ills” attitude is very very misleading.

      I’m trying to express my POV as respectfully as possible because I believe that my opinion is valid and deserves to be the ying of your yang.