There’s always something to howl about.

Lessons Learned While Watching American Idol

Teresa Boardman helped me understand why I sit through all of the excruciatingly bad performances on the first few episodes of American Idol.

My wife and I watch American Idol religiously. It’s one of our guilty pleasures. I know we’re probably going to hell for it, but we’re obviously not alone in our sin. We’ll have some company. The ratings for the Idol are ridiculous. The premiere episode drew 37.4 million viewers last week, a 15.8 rating/36 share in the adults 18-49 demo. The second night was just as big for Fox. But if you’re a saint and don’t watch American Idol, then you have no point of reference for what I’m about to say. So, I’ll explain briefly.

The first episodes feature a laughable string of truly pathetic “performers” trying to make it big in an industry that they are clearly NOT cut out for. Some of the performances are so hideous I literally have to cover my eyes. I want to watch, but it’s just too painful. At one point this evening, my wife said to me, “No! Uncover your eyes. This one is dancing.” OK? No! See, this isn’t “So You Think You Can Dance.”

This is American Idol. It’s a singing competition. If you have to dance, then you probably can’t sing. In fact, if you have to dance, you probably can’t dance either. This is proven over and over again in the first few episodes, before the chosen few “make it to Hollywood.” And one thing is fact – if you have to tell me how great you are… you aren’t.

I don’t watch these first few episodes of American Idol because I like watching people make complete fools of themselves on national television. While I admit there is that morbid fascination, the real joy comes from being able to guess, purely from their self-styled introductions, if a performer is going to be a singer that truly has that special something that distinguishes those who really belong in Hollywood from those who can only tell me that they should be.

Now, here’s where Teresa Boardman comes in. Teresa invited me to her blog today. It was a gracious invitation. “If you come on over to my blog we could have a nice cup of tea and talk about the world of real estate,” she said. Since I had never been, I went. And I enjoyed.

She could just as easily have said, “Hey, Jeff, come take a look at my blog. It’s great. I’m clearly doing something right, because I had over 1000 visitors today and we were mentioned in Realty Times.” But she didn’t. She didn’t have to.

It wasn’t until later this evening that it hit me – Teresa is actually singing. She doesn’t have to tell me she can sing. She knows I can judge that for myself, and will. She has a beautiful voice. And in an audition room full of wannabees, she really stands out. Her Friday Fun posts like “Potato Chips” and “Fruit Cake” allow the reader to know her, to hear her speak in her own unique way. And posts like “Protect Your Credit Rating And Your Privacy” give her readers valuable knowledge, but don’t feel like they were copied and pasted from some template. She auditions really well. As a result, her readers can predict, with a great deal of accuracy, that this is someone they’re going to like to work with. Someone who will help them. Someone they can trust.

Here’s some contrast.

When you do a google search on “st. paul real estate,” she shows up number 6 in the unpaid search results. That’s certainly high enough that I’d find her if I were wandering around the web. When I search in my neck of the woods on “santa clarita real estate,” here is the kind of stuff I find: “Buying And Selling With A #1 Realtor” and “Santa Clarita Valley Ranch Real Estate Agent.” Both of these were on the front page of the google search. I could show you 20 more just like them from the first few pages of google.

I’m sure both of the real estate agents above are fine people. I’m not here to slam them. They are probably very good at their jobs. They just don’t audition well. In fact, I don’t even view their sites as an audition at all. Their sites are just an introduction. They TELL me they are great real estate agents, but they don’t SHOW ME! I can’t begin to imagine how silly American Idol would be if the first few episodes were filled with nothing more than people talking about how well they could sing – without actually singing! But that’s exactly what America gets, 9 out of 10 times, when they go to search for a real estate agent. They get auditions with no singing. They’re looking for someone who can belt out a tune, not someone who can describe how good the chorus is going to sound when they finally break into song!

As I watched American Idol tonight, one thing stood out. The people who proclaimed loudly, “I’m definitely the next American Idol,” were ALL wannabees. Then there were those whose quiet confidence said clearly, “judge for yourself” or “I’m going to give it everything I’ve got.” In each case, their singing stood out.

I am able sit through the first few episodes of American Idol because I know I’m going to see a Kelly Clarkson or a Taylor Hicks emerge from the pack. America goes searching for a real estate agent hoping to find a similar experience. They want someone like Teresa to emerge from the pack. Unfortunately, they don’t have Randy, Paula and Simon weeding out the truly unworthy. And I’m just not sure how long they’ll be willing to sit in front of their screen if so many are unwilling to even audition.