{"id":10588,"date":"2009-12-18T11:52:32","date_gmt":"2009-12-18T18:52:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/?p=10588"},"modified":"2018-01-18T16:20:44","modified_gmt":"2018-01-18T23:20:44","slug":"two-turtle-doves","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/10588\/two-turtle-doves\/","title":{"rendered":"One Turtle Dove"},"content":{"rendered":"

The Glass Ceiling<\/strong><\/p>\n

I<\/strong> remember the moment I decided to stop wearing a suit and tie in public—forever. It was a couple days before Christmas and I dropped by the K-Mart to pick up a punch bowl for the office party.\u00a0 I was looming\u00a0 in Housewares<\/em> when an elderly woman approached me with a fistful of coupons.\u00a0 Alvin and the Chipmunks<\/em> were singing that insidious song through the sound system.<\/p>\n

“I want to file a complaint.”\u00a0 She said.<\/p>\n

“I don’t work here.”\u00a0 Me.<\/p>\n

“You’re not the manager?”\u00a0 She asked,\u00a0 insistent.<\/p>\n

“No. I’m not the manager.<\/em>”\u00a0 I replied, perhaps a little snippy.<\/p>\n

She glared up at me like…well…like I was lying.\u00a0 More than anything, I hate being implicated in an aspersion when I’m innocent. I’d rather receive three french hens every day for a year from someone I don’t truly love than be deemed a liar (unless of course, I actually am, in which case, I will simply deny until totally boxed in).<\/p>\n

“This is an Italian suit,\u00a0 lady. You need to find someone with a name tag,”\u00a0 I continued, perhaps a little prideful.<\/p>\n

“That lady over there said to ask\u00a0 you. That you were a manager<\/em>.” She pressed.<\/p>\n

We turned our attention to a\u00a0 squat woman in a burka, a rare sight in Richmond, Virginia in those days.<\/p>\n

“That lady over there doesn’t speak English.”\u00a0 Me, perhaps a little too loud.<\/p>\n

“I speak better English than you<\/em>,” the lady yelled back across the aisle.\u00a0 “I speak five<\/em> languages. How many you<\/em> speak?”<\/p>\n

Oh yeah.\u00a0 One of\u00a0 those<\/em> days.\u00a0 A blue light siren began twirling above my head and something inaudible was announced over the speakers, interrupting\u00a0 the chipmunk falsetto drone. I froze as a wave of shoppers began scurrying\u00a0 in our direction; something about cutlery<\/em>.<\/p>\n

“You don’t have this Foot Soaker in stock.”\u00a0 The elderly lady shoved a coupon under my nose as the herd surrounded us.<\/p>\n

“I know<\/em> I don’t, ma’am…Because…. I. Don’t. Work.\u00a0 Here.”\u00a0 Me.<\/p>\n

“She deserves a rain check,”\u00a0 Burka lady. “It’s false advertising if you don’t. Bait and switch.”<\/p>\n

“Yes. Bait and switch,”\u00a0 Elderly lady.<\/p>\n

“Bait and Switch!<\/em>”\u00a0 Somebody yelled from the mob. “Bait and Switch….<\/em>”<\/p>\n

About that time an employee approached me and ask Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Glass Ceiling I remember the moment I decided to stop wearing a suit and tie in public—forever. It was a couple days before Christmas and I dropped by the K-Mart to pick up a punch bowl for the office party.\u00a0 I was looming\u00a0 in Housewares when an elderly woman approached me with a fistful […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":26,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4,8,5],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-10588","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"hentry","6":"category-disintermediation","7":"category-investment","8":"category-real-estate","10":"no-featured-image"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":16380,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/16380\/two-turtle-doves-2\/","url_meta":{"origin":10588,"position":0},"title":"Two Turtle Doves (revisited)","author":"Geno Petro","date":"December 18, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"I was weathering a Category 1 hangover the day my big fat Vice President dropped by the office and found me asleep at my desk. He\u2019d come to personally deliver my Christmas bonus (a twenty-dollar bill stapled to a battery-operated Rudolph necktie) and to spread some holiday cheer to the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Real Estate"","block_context":{"text":"Real Estate","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/real-estate\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":15386,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/15386\/giving-thanks-for-a-new-bloodhound-rob-chipman-joins-us-today\/","url_meta":{"origin":10588,"position":1},"title":"Giving thanks for a new Bloodhound: Rob Chipman joins us today.","author":"Greg Swann","date":"November 25, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"My apologies to y'all for my extended absence. I got good and sick on my way back from Anaheim, then doubled-down on dextro last weekend. I managed to put two houses into escrow, but I didn't get a lot else accomplished. And so I owe an even bigger apology to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Blogging"","block_context":{"text":"Blogging","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/blogging\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":8309,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/8309\/multiple-blog-hosting-and-your-files-a-project-bloodhound-problem\/","url_meta":{"origin":10588,"position":2},"title":"Multiple blog hosting and your files. A Project Bloodhound inquiry for DIY WordPress publishing.","author":"Brad Coy","date":"May 8, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"I'm in need of clarity. Being mostly clueless to the concept of file management and hosting in general has led me here by way of looking to publish more then one blog.\u00a0 That, and after spending far too much time with \"online and phone help\" with what should be a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Blogging"","block_context":{"text":"Blogging","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/blogging\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"hosting-control-center-file-manager-1","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/05\/hosting-control-center-file-manager-1.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":3242,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/3242\/missing-the-opportunity-to-achieve-excellence\/","url_meta":{"origin":10588,"position":3},"title":"Missing The Opportunity To Achieve Excellence","author":"Doug Quance","date":"June 18, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"When Going The Extra Mile Simply Makes Good Economic Sense When my best friend asked his mother what she wanted for her 70th birthday, she instantly said, \"To be with my family.\" He offered her a European cruise or other similar possibilities... but she stood firm. Family is what she\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Dirty Laundry"","block_context":{"text":"Dirty Laundry","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/dirty-laundry\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":14862,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/14862\/in-the-land-of-the-free-it-might-be-too-hot-to-go-up-in-flames-on-the-roof-but-its-always-cool-when-you-have-an-air-conditioner-cosy\/","url_meta":{"origin":10588,"position":4},"title":"In the land of the free it might be too hot to go up (in flames) on the roof, but it’s always cool when you have an air conditioner cosy.","author":"Greg Swann","date":"July 27, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Since becoming a property manager in March, I've added some new hats to my collection: I am, like it or don't, a bill collector and a tax collector. As of today, I am on the road to becoming an evictor, as well. I'm phlegmatic about all of this. 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Not only did they roll out a new logo and invade\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Marketing"","block_context":{"text":"Marketing","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/marketing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10588","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/26"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10588"}],"version-history":[{"count":19,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10588\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16557,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10588\/revisions\/16557"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10588"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10588"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10588"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}