{"id":12894,"date":"2010-08-09T20:00:00","date_gmt":"2010-08-10T03:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/?p=12894"},"modified":"2010-08-10T21:59:38","modified_gmt":"2010-08-11T04:59:38","slug":"reasons-to-be-cheerful-part-3-1-4-get-me-rewrite-how-to-revise-the-script-of-your-life-writing-yourself-a-happy-ending","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/12894\/reasons-to-be-cheerful-part-3-1-4-get-me-rewrite-how-to-revise-the-script-of-your-life-writing-yourself-a-happy-ending\/","title":{"rendered":"Reasons to be cheerful, Part 3.1.4: “Get me rewrite!” How to revise the script of your life — writing yourself a happy ending."},"content":{"rendered":"

A friend said this on the phone: “I’m sorry this is taking me so long. I’m really bad at computers.”<\/p>\n

My reply: “Why would you say it that way?”<\/p>\n

“Huh?”<\/p>\n

“I understand that you’re reporting on what you see as being a matter of fact. But why not say it this way: ‘Computers have been a challenge for me, but I find I’m getting better with experience.’ You’re telling the exact same truth, not misrepresenting anything. But by focusing on what you’re doing right, you’ll improve your future performance just by changing your attitude.”<\/p>\n

I’m not talking about canned affirmations. I’m talking about the words you choose when you’re telling the unshaded truth about your life, your mind, your talents, your work, your relationships.<\/p>\n

You can say: “I’m a lousy writer.” But you can be just as truthful by saying this instead: “It hasn’t been easy for me to improve my writing skills, but I’m finding that hard work is paying off for me.”<\/p>\n

You can say: “I always get lost when I go someplace for the first time.” But it would be equally factual to say, “I find it beneficial to prepare carefully before I travel to an unfamiliar neighborhood.”<\/p>\n

You can say: “I’ll probably lose.” But you would be no less honest to say, “I just might win.”<\/p>\n

The statements you make about yourself might seem to you to be statements of fact at the time you are making them. But whatever truth there might be in those expressions right now, you are also<\/em> writing the script for your future. Saying “I’ll probably lose” is functionally equivalent to saying “I’ll never win.” If you don’t mean to say that you can never, ever get anything right, then stop telling these brutal lies about yourself.<\/p>\n

If you invert those expressions instead — concentrating on everything you get right, not everything you get wrong — by that one simple change of habit you will rewrite the script of your future. There’s no telling how high you can rise, once you stop putting yourself down, but, at a minimum, you will write yourself a much happier ending.<\/p>\n

Here’s what I say: I’m Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A friend said this on the phone: “I’m sorry this is taking me so long. I’m really bad at computers.” My reply: “Why would you say it that way?” “Huh?” “I understand that you’re reporting on what you see as being a matter of fact. But why not say it this way: ‘Computers have been […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[24,212,29],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-12894","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"hentry","6":"category-egoism-in-action","7":"category-flourishing","8":"category-group-therapy","10":"no-featured-image"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":16848,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/16848\/unchained-melody-telling-the-brutal-truth-about-take-it-down\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":0},"title":"Unchained Melody: Telling the brutal truth about \u201cTake\u00a0It\u00a0Down.\u201d","author":"Greg Swann","date":"August 31, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"It has been claimed that John Hiatt wrote this song about cancelling the Confederate flag \u2013 but that's plainly bullshit. This is a brutal divorce song, excruciatingly simple. It's amazing, anyway. I play it on the guitar, sometimes for hours, late at night. The lyrics work, and that's why the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Casual Friday"","block_context":{"text":"Casual Friday","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/casual-friday\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/yOBxDfgDZjI\/0.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":3231,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/3231\/sun-tzu-takes-the-art-of-war-to-mr-rogers-neighborhood-while-the-renet-creates-pablum-pimps-who-deal-in-warm-fuzzies\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":1},"title":"Sun Tzu takes the art of war to Mr Roger’s Neighborhood while the RE.net creates pablum pimps who deal in warm fuzzies","author":"Teri Lussier","date":"June 13, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"The RE.net equivalent of Mr. Rogers Neighborhood can easily be found in multiple places but the price you pay for your pablum addiction is very real.","rel":"","context":"In "Casual Friday"","block_context":{"text":"Casual Friday","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/casual-friday\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2611,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/2611\/just-as-a-reminder-the-theme-song-for-the-upcoming-bloodhoundblog-unchained-social-media-marketing-conference-is-i-wont-back-down-by-tom-petty\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":2},"title":"Just as a reminder, the theme song for the upcoming BloodhoundBlog Unchained Social Media Marketing Conference is “I won’t back down” by Tom Petty","author":"Greg Swann","date":"February 17, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Oh, good grief. Normally, when the RE.net goes through one of these public breast-beating episodes, I just stay out of it. I don't read the posts, first because they're stupid and comical, and second because there's nothing that I'm going to say that's not going to fan the flames. The\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Blogging"","block_context":{"text":"Blogging","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/blogging\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":8401,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/8401\/how-we-say_what-we-say_is-important\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":3},"title":"How we say_What we say_Is important","author":"Don Reedy, San Diego, CA","date":"May 14, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"This is actually a post about transparency, but as you'll see, I am not a big fan of the 'word' itself. The idea of belaboring a word all of you seem to take for granted came about as I was talking with Scott Schang a few days ago. We were\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Blogging"","block_context":{"text":"Blogging","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/blogging\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":49,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/49\/look-whos-talking-part-ii-revenge-of-the-shiny-people\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":4},"title":"Look who’s talking, Part II: Revenge of The Shiny People","author":"Odysseus","date":"January 26, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"When Jon Talton lied in the Arizona Republic, telling you that Maroney's Dry Cleaning store on Central Avenue had not been killed by Trolley construction, when it fact it had, I wrote this:The trolley is killing long-established businesses up and down its route, and the green-cheese-heads who inflicted it on\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "General"","block_context":{"text":"General","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/general\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1833,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/1833\/seth-and-teri-on-business-cards\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":5},"title":"Seth (and Teri) on business cards","author":"Teri Lussier","date":"August 21, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Sometimes when I write a post, it is\u00a0done\u00a0in little bits at a time- a few minutes here and a few minutes there.\u00a0Then news or shift happens and oh bloody hell, it changes my post, or horrors-I just trash the whole thing. Take this post for example: It sat in draft\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Blogging"","block_context":{"text":"Blogging","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/blogging\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12894","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12894"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12894\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12895,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12894\/revisions\/12895"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12894"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12894"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12894"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}