{"id":12894,"date":"2010-08-09T20:00:00","date_gmt":"2010-08-10T03:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/?p=12894"},"modified":"2010-08-10T21:59:38","modified_gmt":"2010-08-11T04:59:38","slug":"reasons-to-be-cheerful-part-3-1-4-get-me-rewrite-how-to-revise-the-script-of-your-life-writing-yourself-a-happy-ending","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/12894\/reasons-to-be-cheerful-part-3-1-4-get-me-rewrite-how-to-revise-the-script-of-your-life-writing-yourself-a-happy-ending\/","title":{"rendered":"Reasons to be cheerful, Part 3.1.4: “Get me rewrite!” How to revise the script of your life — writing yourself a happy ending."},"content":{"rendered":"

A friend said this on the phone: “I’m sorry this is taking me so long. I’m really bad at computers.”<\/p>\n

My reply: “Why would you say it that way?”<\/p>\n

“Huh?”<\/p>\n

“I understand that you’re reporting on what you see as being a matter of fact. But why not say it this way: ‘Computers have been a challenge for me, but I find I’m getting better with experience.’ You’re telling the exact same truth, not misrepresenting anything. But by focusing on what you’re doing right, you’ll improve your future performance just by changing your attitude.”<\/p>\n

I’m not talking about canned affirmations. I’m talking about the words you choose when you’re telling the unshaded truth about your life, your mind, your talents, your work, your relationships.<\/p>\n

You can say: “I’m a lousy writer.” But you can be just as truthful by saying this instead: “It hasn’t been easy for me to improve my writing skills, but I’m finding that hard work is paying off for me.”<\/p>\n

You can say: “I always get lost when I go someplace for the first time.” But it would be equally factual to say, “I find it beneficial to prepare carefully before I travel to an unfamiliar neighborhood.”<\/p>\n

You can say: “I’ll probably lose.” But you would be no less honest to say, “I just might win.”<\/p>\n

The statements you make about yourself might seem to you to be statements of fact at the time you are making them. But whatever truth there might be in those expressions right now, you are also<\/em> writing the script for your future. Saying “I’ll probably lose” is functionally equivalent to saying “I’ll never win.” If you don’t mean to say that you can never, ever get anything right, then stop telling these brutal lies about yourself.<\/p>\n

If you invert those expressions instead — concentrating on everything you get right, not everything you get wrong — by that one simple change of habit you will rewrite the script of your future. There’s no telling how high you can rise, once you stop putting yourself down, but, at a minimum, you will write yourself a much happier ending.<\/p>\n

Here’s what I say: I’m Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A friend said this on the phone: “I’m sorry this is taking me so long. I’m really bad at computers.” My reply: “Why would you say it that way?” “Huh?” “I understand that you’re reporting on what you see as being a matter of fact. But why not say it this way: ‘Computers have been […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[24,212,29],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-12894","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"hentry","6":"category-egoism-in-action","7":"category-flourishing","8":"category-group-therapy","10":"no-featured-image"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":16848,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/16848\/unchained-melody-telling-the-brutal-truth-about-take-it-down\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":0},"title":"Unchained Melody: Telling the brutal truth about \u201cTake\u00a0It\u00a0Down.\u201d","author":"Greg Swann","date":"August 31, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"It has been claimed that John Hiatt wrote this song about cancelling the Confederate flag \u2013 but that's plainly bullshit. This is a brutal divorce song, excruciatingly simple. It's amazing, anyway. I play it on the guitar, sometimes for hours, late at night. The lyrics work, and that's why the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Casual Friday"","block_context":{"text":"Casual Friday","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/casual-friday\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/img.youtube.com\/vi\/yOBxDfgDZjI\/0.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":49,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/49\/look-whos-talking-part-ii-revenge-of-the-shiny-people\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":1},"title":"Look who’s talking, Part II: Revenge of The Shiny People","author":"Odysseus","date":"January 26, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"When Jon Talton lied in the Arizona Republic, telling you that Maroney's Dry Cleaning store on Central Avenue had not been killed by Trolley construction, when it fact it had, I wrote this:The trolley is killing long-established businesses up and down its route, and the green-cheese-heads who inflicted it on\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "General"","block_context":{"text":"General","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/general\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2868,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/2868\/the-theory-of-sales-relativity\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":2},"title":"The Theory Of Sales Relativity","author":"Russell Shaw","date":"March 31, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"When we upend things in physics these days, it's not necessarily that the old things were wrong. It's just that underlying it is a more complete theory. Quantum mechanics tells us that a ball is made up of atoms, but Newton's laws still work just fine. You can predict the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Marketing"","block_context":{"text":"Marketing","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/marketing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Web 2","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/03\/web-2.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":18337,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/18337\/overnight-news-graffiti-is-the-workaround-to-net-censorship-buck-phiden\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":3},"title":"Overnight News: \u201cGraffiti is the workaround to net censorship.\u201d \u2013Buck\u00a0Phiden","author":"Greg Swann","date":"July 22, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Somewhere in the city of the night a lone rebel makes his mark, raising his fist in defiance of big-tech censorship as he slashes out his message: \u201cGraffiti is the social network of the perma-banned.\u201d \u2013Buck Phiden Yes, Buck Phiden, the magatagger, the clean, serene meme-machine, the paleo-artisanal wall-blogger. Description?\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Group Therapy"","block_context":{"text":"Group Therapy","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/group-therapy\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Ya think it's easy?","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/BHBNewTopImage-300x225.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":3231,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/3231\/sun-tzu-takes-the-art-of-war-to-mr-rogers-neighborhood-while-the-renet-creates-pablum-pimps-who-deal-in-warm-fuzzies\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":4},"title":"Sun Tzu takes the art of war to Mr Roger’s Neighborhood while the RE.net creates pablum pimps who deal in warm fuzzies","author":"Teri Lussier","date":"June 13, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"The RE.net equivalent of Mr. Rogers Neighborhood can easily be found in multiple places but the price you pay for your pablum addiction is very real.","rel":"","context":"In "Casual Friday"","block_context":{"text":"Casual Friday","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/casual-friday\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":6962,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/6962\/max-vs-the-1000-pound-gorilla\/","url_meta":{"origin":12894,"position":5},"title":"Max vs. The 1000-Pound Gorilla","author":"Jessica Horton","date":"February 19, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Meet Max. He\u2019s the cute little mascot for Homegain.com Meet The 1000-Pound Gorilla (Hint: It ain't really move.com Those are really fists, codename: Thunder and Lightning) This is Max telling me about the advantages of Homegain.com over on my Active Rain blog. (about the fourth comment down: Louis Cammarosano) This\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Blogging"","block_context":{"text":"Blogging","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/blogging\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/blog.homegain.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/09\/max-tar-texas-expo.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12894","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12894"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12894\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12895,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12894\/revisions\/12895"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12894"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12894"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12894"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}