{"id":4590,"date":"2008-09-23T09:14:03","date_gmt":"2008-09-23T16:14:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/?p=4590"},"modified":"2008-09-30T16:37:22","modified_gmt":"2008-09-30T23:37:22","slug":"funny-ha-ha","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/4590\/funny-ha-ha\/","title":{"rendered":"Funny, ha ha"},"content":{"rendered":"

I grab myself by the ear and drag my own sorry ass to the ‘place’ where I’m supposed to be writing something significant on a daily basis–a small, shady library room in the front of our 1890s Victorian house in Chicago. I look around and consider my resources: Mission style writing desk and leather straight back chair; Laptop, printer, copier; A collection of books by the greatest writers who have ever lived (and died); Google, Dictionary.com, iPhone; Sleeping dog, indifferent cat, supportive third wife; Eight years of The New Yorker stacked on every available dusty surface; Picture window; Bucolic setting; Liberal arts degree from a Pennsylvania state college.<\/p>\n

Lamps, photographs, framed art. Unlimited coffee less than 20 feet away…<\/p>\n

Viscerally speaking, I have only one excuse–nothing is funny to me these days. I’m just not feeling it. I stare at the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest every week and no juice. Nada. Zilcho. I hate Seinfeld anymore. Larry David, too. What a schmuck.<\/p>\n

“Have you written anything today?” she asks from the other room. The television room across the hall where fallen stars dance and more desperate housewives than mine (I would hope) plot their own nefarious outcomes.<\/p>\n

“Yes. The electric bill,” I say. “I wrote a check for the electric bill.” Ha ha funny.<\/p>\n

“What about the mortgage?” On a different subject now. Diversion from the creative to the financial. Not very funny. (What she really means is ‘have you sold any real estate lately?’)<\/p>\n

Good question. What about the mortgage? We’re being triple escrowed by our lender because the Cook County Tax Assessor’s office incorrectly recorded our deed while in a land far, far away called Reality, the whole banking industry is in a wind sheared tailspin. I look at the Due Notice.<\/p>\n

“Too many digits,” I say, really wanting to run it through the shredder. “I’ll do that tomorrow before I work on my book. We have until the 15th.” Like something magical is going to happen between now and the ides of procrastination. An economic recovery package perhaps. Not even Ha ha. Barely LOL.<\/p>\n

“How is<\/em> the book coming?” she asks. Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I grab myself by the ear and drag my own sorry ass to the ‘place’ where I’m supposed to be writing something significant on a daily basis–a small, shady library room in the front of our 1890s Victorian house in Chicago. I look around and consider my resources: Mission style writing desk and leather straight […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":26,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-4590","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"hentry","6":"category-real-estate","8":"no-featured-image"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":517,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/517\/casual-friday-its-a-sports-movie-its-a-vegas-movie-its-a-raucously-funny-comedy\/","url_meta":{"origin":4590,"position":0},"title":"Casual Friday: It’s a sports movie, it’s a Vegas movie, it’s a raucously funny comedy . . .","author":"Greg Swann","date":"October 6, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"It's been a rich fully Friday in Bloodhoundville, so I have but one word for Casual Friday: Dodgeball. 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I love Sunday despite the fact that I don't believe anything I don't have to, and most especially do I love to start my Sunday with the Sun God of my own idolatry: The blinding brilliance of a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Blogging"","block_context":{"text":"Blogging","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/blogging\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2898,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/2898\/all-in-a-days-work-for-real-estate-agents-humorous-heartwarming-stories\/","url_meta":{"origin":4590,"position":2},"title":"All In a Day’s Work for Real Estate Agents: Humorous & Heartwarming Stories","author":"Russell Shaw","date":"April 4, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Seeing this post on agentgenius made me realize that I had neglected to post this email I received a few weeks ago. 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About a year ago, I posted that the Android OS was going to free me from Windows (and Office.) \u00a0Unfortunately, the g1 was a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Real Estate"","block_context":{"text":"Real Estate","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/real-estate\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":132,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/132\/word-slinging-in-the-rain-or-how-i-learned-to-stop-worrying-and-love-the-blog\/","url_meta":{"origin":4590,"position":4},"title":"Word-slinging in the Rain — or: How I learned to stop worrying and love the blog . . .","author":"Greg Swann","date":"July 25, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"None of this is new to me -- except for the parts that are. I've been writing on the nets since before there were nets. Since BBS systems -- I ran two of them at different times of my life. 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