{"id":798,"date":"2011-11-24T13:15:25","date_gmt":"2011-11-24T20:15:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/?p=798"},"modified":"2011-11-24T13:15:41","modified_gmt":"2011-11-24T20:15:41","slug":"christmas-story-a-dumpster-divers-christmas","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/798\/christmas-story-a-dumpster-divers-christmas\/","title":{"rendered":"A dumpster diver’s Christmas"},"content":{"rendered":"

A Ramblin’ Gamblin’ Willie story<\/i><\/p>\n

I can be counted upon to walk, after all.<\/p>\n

When everybody’s nowhere and even the laundromats are empty. When the respectable stores are closed and the line at the 24-Hour Slurp ‘n’ Burp is 15 deep with people craving cold beer and hot salsa and high-octane unleaded. When there’s one lonely mailman in an immense empty truck delivering insanely last-minute gifts sent via God-Help-Me-If-I-Screw-It-Up-Again Express Mail. When the streets are empty and the highways are empty and the parking lots are empty and, for once, even the bars are empty — I can be counted upon to walk. You’re at home with the yule log blazing, with a glazed ham baking, with a Bordeaux breathing, with the children seething to tear into that cache of treasures parked beneath the tree. And Uncle Willie’s out walking on Christmas Eve, dragging his pencil on the pavement for no good reason at all.<\/p>\n

“Storm windows,” John Prine sings. “Gee, but I’m getting old. Storm windows, keep away the cold.” And that’s a silly enough thought in the great outdoors. I was cutting through an apartment complex and the closed-for-the-holidays supermarket next door had left its parking lot speakers blaring. And the radio station was playing a song they’d never play if they thought anyone was listening.<\/p>\n

I can hear the wheels of automobiles
\nso far away, just moving along through the drifting snow.
\nIt’s times like these, when the temperatures freeze
\nI sit alone, looking at the world through a storm window.
\nDown on the beach, the sandman sleeps.
\nTime don’t fly, it bounds and leaps.
\nThe country band, it plays for keeps.
\nThey play it so slow…<\/i><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

I was about twenty feet away from a big blue dumpster and I heard a rustle. You can take the boy out of the city, but you can’t take away the boy’s revulsion for rats, and I was suddenly in the mood to be walking elsewhere. But then there was a big tumble-rumble-boom, something big knocking into the steel walls of the dumpster, and I knew it wasn’t a rat.<\/p>\n

And I knew what it was, too, and so do you. We call them Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A Ramblin’ Gamblin’ Willie story I can be counted upon to walk, after all. When everybody’s nowhere and even the laundromats are empty. When the respectable stores are closed and the line at the 24-Hour Slurp ‘n’ Burp is 15 deep with people craving cold beer and hot salsa and high-octane unleaded. When there’s one […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[13,24],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-798","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"hentry","6":"category-casual-friday","7":"category-egoism-in-action","9":"no-featured-image"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":440,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/440\/blogoff-post-63-divorcing-couples-need-togetherness-on-sale-of-house\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":0},"title":"Blogoff Post #63: Divorcing couples need togetherness on sale of house . . .","author":"Greg Swann","date":"September 26, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"This is a special favorite from my Arizona Republic column:Consider this: I walk into a home, escorting buyers. In the living room there are two pieces of furniture: a big-screen television and a lawn chair. The bedrooms are empty, except for the master bedroom, where there is a bare mattress.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Marketing"","block_context":{"text":"Marketing","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/marketing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":16993,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/16993\/divorcing-couples-need-togetherness-on-sale-the-sale-of-their-house\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":1},"title":"Divorcing couples need togetherness on sale the sale of their\u00a0house.","author":"Greg Swann","date":"September 12, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"We plant the seed of love and it takes root and grows toward the sun, a straight, proud, sturdy tree. That's the hope, anyway. Sometimes, alas, the sapling of love withers and dies. Pulling it up by the roots can occasion no end of problems, but the real-estate problem may\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Flourishing"","block_context":{"text":"Flourishing","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/flourishing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/hutomo-abrianto-p5CFpOiYweU-unsplash-480x320.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1916,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/1916\/empty-calories-sugar-coated-credit-crunch-is-great-for-any-meal\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":2},"title":"Empty calories? Sugar-Coated Credit Crunch is great for any meal","author":"Greg Swann","date":"September 11, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Hat tip: Poor and Stupid. Technorati Tags: investment, real estate, real estate marketing","rel":"","context":"In "Investment"","block_context":{"text":"Investment","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/investment\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":7158,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/7158\/engenu-epiphany-1-folders-become-pages\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":3},"title":"engenu Epiphany #1: Folders become pages","author":"Cheryl Johnson","date":"February 26, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"When I saw this a few days ago on BHB, I was not sure I could come up with anything \"helpful\". Like most folks, when I first looked at engenu last year, I just didn't \"get\" it.\u00a0 In fact, I didn't \"get\"\u00a0 it until just yesterday when I decided to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Blogging"","block_context":{"text":"Blogging","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/blogging\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5565,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/5565\/the-house-of-atreus\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":4},"title":"The House of Atreus","author":"Geno Petro","date":"November 16, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"I watch him, through the French terrace doors in the living room, as he ambles across the sidewalk and up the limestone steps of my still unsold 1.5 million dollar McMansion. He double parked his Escalade next to my X3 without bothering to put on his flashers, its mere shadow\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Disintermediation"","block_context":{"text":"Disintermediation","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/disintermediation\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":742,"url":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/742\/never-show-up-at-somebodys-home-empty-handed\/","url_meta":{"origin":798,"position":5},"title":"Never show up at someone’s home empty-handed","author":"Dan Green","date":"December 7, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Hello, world. It's a pleasure to meet everyone, and I thought I'd bring you some flowers to warm you over. I am thrilled to be a part of BHB, but can't tell for the life of me who our true audience is and -- without knowing the audience -- I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Marketing"","block_context":{"text":"Marketing","link":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/category\/marketing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/a764.g.akamai.net\/f\/764\/16742\/1h\/www.1800flowers.com\/800f_assets\/images\/flowers\/images\/shop\/catalog\/1403.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=798"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15385,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798\/revisions\/15385"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=798"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=798"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bloodhoundrealty.com\/BloodhoundBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=798"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}